Toxic people are a common challenge in both personal and professional relationships. Whether they’re clueless as to their performance, happy to cause misery, or intent on destroying the morale of your workplace, one thing is common: they don’t bring much joy or ease into relationships, either personal or professional.
Note: This article is part of our archival content and belongs to a previous phase of our publication. Amaranth Magazine is now a dedicated literary magazine.
Scores of people lack the confidence to express themselves when emotionally hurt by another individual. People with high emotional intelligence, however, know how to handle such relationships. These can be overcome with the help of certain strategies, and they can survive these encounters more easily. This article explains how emotionally intelligent people handle toxic individuals by highlighting some key strategies and the essence of emotional self-regulation.
What Makes a Person Toxic?
A toxic person is a person whose behavior continuously brings others down or destroys them. A toxic person can seem negative, manipulative, selfish, or always complaining about something. Over time, people around such a person will start to feel drained, anxious, or frustrated. It is important for mental and emotional health that a person learns when people are toxic. Common signs of toxic people include regular criticism, deceitfulness, mood swings, and social isolation.
Toxic people add another dimension to this effect on mental health. According to research by the Department of Biological and Clinical Psychology at Friedrich Schiller University in Germany, exposure to toxic people can trigger a massive stress response in the brain. The negative emotions such as anger, frustration, and anxiety that one feels when interacting with toxic people have harmful physiological effects over time.
The Role of Emotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage one’s own emotions and the emotions of others. People with high EQ are good at keeping their cool in trying situations, which makes them unusually effective at handling interactions with toxic people. A study by TalentSmartEQ, that assessed more than a million people, reported that 90 percent of top performers were good at managing their stress and staying calm under pressure. These high achievers had developed ways to handle toxic people, including methods that would de-escalate the toxicity without expelling too much of their own emotional energy.
12 Ways to Deal With Toxic People
Emotionally intelligent people use a number of strategies in dealing with toxic people. Such strategies will enable them to manage the emotional burden of such interactions and maintain control of their behavior and mental states.
1- Set Limits-especially with Complainers
Toxic people complain about everything, and they never do anything to solve their problems. Emotionally intelligent people know how to set clear boundaries with complainers. They ask the complainer how he is going to solve the problem. Emotionally intelligent people redirect the conversation by asking questions that will move the discussion in a positive direction. By setting limits on the time spent with toxic people, they prevent themselves from getting drawn into negativity.
2. Don’t Get Drawn Into the Fight
Engaging a toxic person on an emotional level can only escalate a situation. Emotionally intelligent people know when to avoid conflict altogether. Thus, instead of an impulsive reaction, they choose their battles and step back when necessary. This way, they can save their emotional energy for more important things.
3. Rise Above Toxic Behavior
One of the most powerful strategies to handle toxic people is to “rise above.” Toxic individuals tend to become irrational and emotive. Rather than becoming emotional too, emotionally intelligent people step back from the situation to analyze it. They deal with the facts of the situation rather than with the mayhem.
4. Keep Appraised of Your Emotions
Awareness is one very important part of emotional intelligence. Emotionally intelligent people are more in tune with their emotions and will know when they are being stirred up by a toxic person. This self-awareness helps them to take a step back and regroup before responding. By taking a moment to reflect, they can choose the most effective response and avoid being swept away by negative emotions.
5. Set Boundaries
Setting clear boundaries is one of the most effective ways to handle toxic people. Emotionally intelligent people proactively set these boundaries, choosing when and how they will interact with toxic individuals. They make their limits clear and assertively communicate them so that their limits are honored. When emotionally intelligent people’s limits are challenged, they stand firm and maintain control of their interactions.
6. Protect Your Joy
Toxic people thrive on bringing others down, while emotionally intelligent people simply don’t allow anyone to steal their joy. They derive joy from within, and the opinions or actions of toxic people just do not affect them. By maintaining their self-worth, they avoid the emotional brutality that toxic people can cause.
7. Focus on Solutions, Not Problems
The focus on the solution and not on the problem is another viable strategy in managing toxic people. Rather than being drowned by negativity, emotionally intelligent people shift their attention to ways of constructively remedying the situation. The problem-focused approach thus empowers and reduces emotional burden brought about by toxic people.
8. Don’t Forget, But Forgive
Forgiveness is an important part of emotional intelligence, but it doesn’t mean forgetting the harm caused by toxic people. Emotionally intelligent people forgive others to release themselves from the burden of resentment. However, they are also cognizant of their past experiences, taking measures so as not to get hurt again.
9. Avoid Negative Self-Talk
Toxic people can very easily create emotional damage that will have one questioning themselves negatively and feeling inferior. Emotionally intelligent people realize when such destructive thought patterns emerge, and they do something about it. They challenge negative thoughts and focus on constructive, empowering self-talk that reinforces their confidence and resilience.
10. Limit Caffeine and Stressors
Toxic interactions heighten stress, and caffeine is one such substance that heightens stress. Emotionally intelligent people limit their intake of caffeine since too much caffeine can trigger the body’s fight-or-flight response, which impairs rational thinking. By minimizing such stressors, they keep a clear, focused mind when dealing with toxic people.
11. Prioritize Sleep
Sleep is an important aspect of emotional regulation. When emotionally intelligent people are dealing with toxic behavior, they make sure to get enough rest to rejuvenate themselves. A good night’s sleep bolsters their emotional intelligence and aids them in remaining calm and efficient when dealing with difficult people.
12. Draw on Your Support System
Finally, emotionally intelligent people know the value of a support system. They seek advice and emotional support from trusted friends, family members, or colleagues. A fresh perspective from someone outside the situation can provide valuable insights and coping strategies for managing toxic people.
Why Emotional Intelligence Matters
The ability to deal effectively with toxic people is a crucial component in personal and professional success. As a way of developing emotional intelligence, individuals will reduce the amount of stress and emotional harm caused by such people. Emotionally intelligent people know how to set boundaries, remain calm under pressure, and solve problems as ways of safeguarding their mental and emotional well-being while maintaining composure during difficult situations.
These strategies will help anyone to be more emotionally intelligent and prepared for dealing with toxic people, both in a working atmosphere and in a personal relationship. Emotional intelligence provides the much-needed tool to navigate through all human relationships.
